Friday, April 30, 2010

Home I come!!

Finally... i havent slept for like another 40 hour continuously.. cause i was packing and the time for comfort sleep has past, cudn't really sleep well under the noon brightness and heat and furthermore mom sort of hinted for something.. i think it was some hint.. =p but fair enough.. i shud have thought of it.. here is how it happen..

i call home to confirm my bus with mom.. then somewhere in the conversation, she say..

mom: ping, now is mothers day, do they have promotion on perfume? u think u can get some sample like the one u got for me last time?

(wat happen was i got a kenzo flower miniature for mom last time cause it was a gift when i bought a kenzo power)

i start to feel guilty cause come to think of it mom hasn't bought any perfume for dunno how long, and she is asking for miniature and sample.. feel really heartache to hear it..

cp: mee.. they dun give sample anyhow la.. i just buy for u la..

mom: no la, dun waste money, i just want to try some sample see which is good..

*heartache again..

cp: is okay, last time my friend bought one and get a free gift plus miniature also.. i go see la..

mom: mm.. okay la, but dun get too heavy smell one, i want lighter flavor..

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so.. obviously mom wants one right? but fair enough.. glad she mention.. how cud i havent thought of it.. well i know actually.. it is because of the swarovski =p

I remember my friend did indeed got a good promo with Versace during christmas, so after confirming kenzo flower is not that mom flavor, i went for it. $150 for 100ml floral plus another lighter floral-citrusy 30ml plus a miniature of each of the 2.. not too bad huh?

But the price to be declare to mom is $80.. =p i mean she doesn't have to know i am "hao sun zai" right =p what with the necklace coming up..

Anyway...... home in a few hours!!!!!! finally some peace and quiet and away from all these life for a week..

all of u that have been reading.. thanks for visitng.. see u guys again after this week =)

Thursday, April 29, 2010

Different Phases

On my gay-social-networking accounts, i get a relatively larger response from guys (or as i usually call them kids) younger than me, mostly in the range of 18-21.. which is something i feel really helpless. Okay, maybe i do look young but if they bother to read my profile, they would know i am already 24 (actually 25 this december..) . I dun wan to openly write down that i am not interested in guys younger than me cause what happen if there is a really really cute one? (then maybe there will be exception =p ) But generally saying, it is a no. Cause like how i have been through, and i know it takes time to learn may things in life, in relationship. Even i am still learning, what more for them who are just barely of age.. It is really about mentality.

I still remember when i was around 18. I met a guy online who is really handsome but he wasn't keen at all because partly i am a kid and secondly he seeks financial independent. Well.. so everyone has to go through this phase. (Having a rich uncle looking after you is another story.. they are after young kids anyway..)

Sometimes when i think a kid is cute or he really makes an effort to write a nice mail, i would open up his profile and check. Being in Singapore, u will be surprise how mature kids nowadays are (maybe i am from small town, so it is a culture shock for me). I mean they openly says they want fun, sex etc etc.. But there are also the normal ones, which reminds me of myself, how optimistic i was, how naive i was, to dream of looking for a guy to "take care of me". This phrase, is probably one of the most widely said among young kids. Maybe being gay, there are some parts of us that is weak, that seek comfort and support....

But after going through a relationship, I realize i have been getting more than seeking someone's concern, someone to take care of me. In fact, I realize i like the feeling of doing the reverse, to look after someone, to take care of someone. But it is just a natural feeling when u like someone right? I dun need someone to take care of me, but i need companion, i need attention though, and i am kinda possesive. Maybe this is annother phase which will past after i grew up more?

Thera are probably many phases too in a us. But what worried me most is the faith in relationship, from what i see, many people who is nearing 40 have pretty much given up on seeking relationship, mostly because they have seen and experienced enough of break ups, betrayal. Or maybe there are still things that i don't see, afterall they have live through and do know better indeed..

I know i will probably change from time to time, just like my best friend says, when they first knew me 2 years back, i was shy and reserved, but now, i am so openly going after guys.. (and i usually reply, yea, i am not young anymore, why shud i continue to act innocent and wait for people to come after me... =p) But I just hope i wont reach the stage that I will eventually loose faith in love, trust.. I need some luck, I need some assurance, I need a shoulder to lean against.. I am not asking for anything, but just a very small moment of comfort, when i want to escape from the real world.. that's all i wish for.. someone to be there..

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

A Place

It is common to see in dramas (mandarin or canto) that one person will ask the other this question: "Does your heart really have me?"

Okay, it couldn't sound more broken than this, but i wrote that because it is the direct translation and if u know any dialect u can reverse it and get the idea. A more appropriate translation is, "Do i really have a place in ur heart?"

Still sounds weird cause obviously his/her heart has blood vessels, heart chamber, a valve etc etc... okay i know i am crapping, it is a literal meaning that if one really cares about the other..

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*I know I havent been posting songs for a while, reason being i usually blog from my phone recently, and not that it doesn't do that, but i didn't want to download u-tube with my data plan and waste it.. since i only have 1Gb now.. =p

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The name of the song is, 位置(wei zhi) which translate to "position" or more appropriate in this song "A Place", by a singer that u probably wud know only if u watch enough of taiwan shows in recent years. Not a diva but definitely have a lot of good songs, and this is one i came accross recently..

This is one of the kind of songs u wudn't fell for it immediately, rather after a few times and listening to the chorus part..

Again, it is the lyrics that makes me emo again... It jut makes me think..

Being in the gay community, it is common that we know each other as total strangers, if you are not each other cup of tea, you probably wouldn't even look twice at a person. So you hardly have any impact on the person and it is just a passer-by.

If you are his or her cup of tea (appearance).. u know at least u made it to his eyes, cause that's how it begins, by being right in each other's eyes..

Then we start to date each other.. if things goes well, and you keep thinking about this person.. A book u see at the newspaper stand reminds you of what he told you about the book he read recently. A car u see on the street reminds you of how he wish he doesn't have to take public transport cause he always couldn't get a seat. When you are queuing at McDonalds to buy your lunch, you remember the time you 2 had Carl's Junior and how the both of u love the fried zuchinni. Seeing a couple on the street reminds you of the time u took his hand and hold it tightly and didn't want to let it go cause you wants him to know how much he means to you.. Now he has a place in your mind, cause your thoughts are naturally link to him..

Only until someday, you realize you don't need him anymore, cause now, he is part of you, it is no longer a company, no longer a dependent, but rather, someone u instintively give everything you have, your love, your attention, your time, without having any doubt.. that, is when he has A Place in your heart...

Listening to the song makes me think that what does having a place in someone heart means? Whatever I have written above is solely my imagination, cause somehow, I don't suppose i have made it to anyone's heart before (in terms of lover) I probably have reach someone's mind, I know he probably might think of me once in a while.. but talk about when you truly feel so much for someone until you can give selflessly.. Maybe that's is when you truly love someone?

If you feel that you do have a place in someone's heart, and you feel the same for him, don't be stingy, tell him that you love him as much as you can.. sometimes people need assurance, don't let it stop halfway and end up in regret.. give all you can, to make him a place in your heart..

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

When it is easy, this is what u get..

Cheapo citibank!

okay.. so thats the desperate bank here.. and i realize that getting something too easy is not good cause it makes their customer service less professional..

I am not saying that being cheapo they shudn't have good cs.. but i can understand that for the salary they pay, plus the number of cust they need to handle a day (cause they r cheapo, not complaing cause that's why i got my card anyway, but it is a fact) obviously they wud loose some patience towards the end of the day.. so as an understanding and kind customer, what i did when my card wasn't ready as promised.. and the attitude the cs girl display (eg. qustioned me as if i dun understand english and anyhow toss my IC around because her table is messy and she needed space.. etc etc)

I did my best (with high EQ of course) to not scream at her and use word like d*mn or f*ck cause my dad thought us not too since we were young..

So all i did was telling them, okay i will come back and collect tmr.. (coldly, with no smile on my face.. which is uncommon with me) even that, the staffs just acted as if it is not their fault the card got delayed.. bloody cheapo bank and their bloody customer service!

Monday, April 26, 2010

Credit card in our generation

How hard(or easy) is it to get a credit card these days?

I was intending to get a credit card eversince i became eligible.. which is to say becoming a PR. Especially i am going to be on holiday soon, it will be more convenient to have one i guess.. right?

So.. knowing where the promoters will be, i deliberately walk past it and let them approach (so it will look more like they are selling and i reluctantly say, okay, okay..u have been trying to sell so hard, i will just give it a try then.. ), and the whole process took less than 30 minutes and 3 cards will be ready for collection by tomorrow evening. That was how easy it is.. and u dun even need company letter watsoever, just the payslip (only 1 month will do.. can u imagiine how desperate they are?) and some IDs and u can opt up to 10 cards if u wish..

I remember when i was young and dad had a credit card, i was like really impressed cause although he didn't reach the min salary requirement but somehow working for the government there r exception given.. and it was really rare back then.. like only for the rich ppl, as u see in movies, u get to be smug and show-offy with girls' eyes glowing over ur cards.. But now.. it is really really 'cheap' to own it.. looking at how easily it is processed and approved..

The only thing i am curious to see tmr is the credit limit i get.. which cud be a bit of surprise.. hehe..

btw, guess which bank is so desperate?

Sunday, April 25, 2010

Over Analyzed

Or in a layman term, i guess it is called "think too much"

Being gay, there is a tendency to over analyzed.. meaning to say? becoming suspicious and poking around and checking cell phones sms, checking each other social networking account to look for "evidence".. then working stories out in mind about what is going on.. for a simple reason, cause he wont tell us the truth, or at least that's what the person believe the other won't...

Okay, i have to admit, this is already a failure in a relationship, because there is no trust. Second, if u are sensible to think it the other way, if it is true, that means there is just that much love he has for u, what good is it to dig out and proove? what is there that can be changed? argue then break up? slap him on the face? Whatever it is, the end will be same, the end will come.. Anyway, during a reltionship, senses doesn't seem to be tht active..

Okay I have side track, i was about to talk about over analyzed which is to think too much and working out stories, cause and effect... But then again, not everyone can do it, ur brain has to turn fast enough for u to be so sensitive and be smart to work out something that is close to the truth based on what u got.. So it is not somethin everyone can be good at too....

In my case, i admit i think a lot, in fact He knows my brain turn fast in maths, and now probably he knows my thought turn as fast too.. Sometimes i wish i wasn't, i wud be much happier in a way. But since the age of 14, I hve know i cannot always be the kind of kid that gets what u want. ..

In fact, I have seen how my parents have been looked down by their siblings, my uncles and aunts (even my mom's dad, he obviously dun like us and my dad cause he is not as wealthy as the other uncles.. ) but as a kid what can i do? I was determined to take care of my family since then, since my dad went abroad to work to support the family. Since then it is down to me and mom to support the family, and the uncles and aunts have been even more sarcastics.. So I figure out one way, which is to be as polite as i can, so they cannot find any bad thing about me to talk about. Of course subsequently i also have had my best friend who help me in studies and made it on paper all thru PMR, SPM and even the somewhat "Best" student in STPM of my school for the year.. all these pretty much shut them up, since i was the best performing among my cousins, i.e. their kids..

But the impact is there, eventually i grew to learn how to catch and tell what people thinks and what is the answer they want, from observing.. So i can make sure they dun have a chance to even be sarcastics to us.. All these years, i learn to observe what someones's hopes fo hear.. .. Eventually in office, i need to do the same to minimized the impact of what i say or do.. It does help to say the right thing in office, at least people respect u and like u. But i carry this habit too far, into my relationship.. which according to a friend, is not good, and i thought so too looking back, looking at it now...

If only i think less, wud there be any difference? I will try.. but it is now like a self protect mechanism that opens up automatically... but still, i will try..

Saturday, April 24, 2010

Morning at McD

This is very very early morning.. reason? well i have decided to wait for a reply and ended up getting none again... typical of this pathetic person.. not like u dun hav a date but u hav to turn away the others.. well..

Anyway.. at least i still have McCafe which will always be there for me.. muacks..

A typical thing is probably something like this...


but there was once, the waiter served me this..



Do i look like a kid seriously... = ="

Another morning at McD.. remember what u said?

Friday, April 23, 2010

Singlish : Sabo

I am not 100% sure if this is totally a part of Singlish as I havent heard of it till I came here and it is actually very commonly used among the locals.

But just being here, somehow we have to get acclimatize to the culture (well or maybe I shud say accidentally let the culture sip in a little) and thus I have used it once in a while too..

The origin of the word:
Sabotage (my understanding is, to destroy)

How it is used:
Scenario 1:
Professor: "Who knows how to solve this equation?"
Friend A: " Sir, Ah Beng knows!"
Ah Beng: " Walau sabo me! "

Scenario 2:
Professor: "Who knows how to solve this equation?"
Friend A: " Sir, Ah Beng knows!"
Ah Beng... = ="
Friend B: "Eh, u kena sabo leh.."

The reason i am talking about it cause there was a perfect situation to used it yesterday during my boss farewell party..

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Background info: Previously during the introduction session they were asking what is ur interest so at that time i spend a lot of time in Karaoke.. so naturally i said that and they all remember it forever.
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There was this music genius who really doesn't look very "musical" in our team that play us 2 songs on piano and then another on guitar. When he was playing the guitar and singing a very nice song (I mean the song itself was nice.. no comment on the singer =p) .. It is "I'm Yours" by Jason Mraz.. So naturally I was humming along (behind the crowd).. Then...

Colleague A: "EH!! Chih Ping, what are you doing there!! " (aloud = =")

Me: "Walau.. sabo me.. " = ="

But too late.. everyone suddenly remember what i said before and turn and pull me to the centre, it was awkward cause obviously the guitar was the main show i was standing there like a moron singing along.. and further more, the best part which is th beginning was already sang.. hmph.. =p

Anyway it is the second time, first time it was my boss who ask me to sing the song he met his wife =p.. So tips of the day, if u want to tell someone / people something, make sure there are no or minimal side effect..

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Holiday!!

Finally... I am going on a holiday!!!

Well not exactly an overseas trip but just a city i haven't step foot on for at least 5-6 years.. And it really was all a coincident that made this trip happen..

Factor 1: My brother is taking IELTS in this city. So they have to stay at least one nite, but since i can join, I made it 2 nites (possibly 3 now that i look at it)

Factor 2: It is on the mother's day week, so as a son, i ought to go back if i can make it.

Factor 3: My nite shift was extended to June, so my colleague was suggesting we take a break together so that week will be like a middle break.

Factor 4: I need to take my mom's and brother's gift back to them ^^ (for this, again i owe a thank to you..)

So it makes this trip all the more sensible to be on.. Was searching for hotel at the place and ended up going to one where we stayed like 10 years ago.. still seems the most attractive offer available and the difference is I am sponsoring it this time round =p

Ahh... finally a good break, i miss home so much and this time i have a week to spend for holiday and at home, missed "dai shu kiok", "ngao lam fun", "gai si hor fun", and... DIM SUM!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Burn my hand!!!

Stupid water cooler!!!

The stand was flimsy and i didn't realixe, in an attempt to save my mug i caught it without realizing it was filling with boiling water..

so now.. my Hand is cooked.. burned...

very pain ah!!!

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

New iPhone !?

I saw this in the morning paper delivered to our office..

"... Some Apple guy leaves his iPhone prototype in a bar. Some guy finds it. A few weeks go by. He then leaks photos of the thing to both Engadget and Gizmodo..."

Okay, my first reaction was... Bloody hell!!! I just got my phone like yesterday and u leaked the photos the next day, what's that suppose to mean, I am buying a new-old model!!

But after looking at the photos I kinda feel relief..

here is how it looks


For one, the design doesn't look impressive, the screw below look too obvious and rough to be realy consider beautiful (who wants to see a screw under their phone honestly). Then for someone who has been checking out nokia phones for years, I some how have a feeling that it really resembles nokia design, look at N81, N82, N86 and even the N97, N900.. the side metal and squarish design is very similar.

Furthermore, apple's highlight has always been the software not hardware.. so another point is why dont they show what the phone can do but rather only the outside..

Anyway if i picked the phone up I probably will invite apple and the media to bid for it rather than sell for mere 5k..

Somehow i am still convinced myself this is either some prank or Apple ways's of marketing.. I am willing to bet... RM 10! that this is a fake..

Monday, April 19, 2010

Guiltiness

Time to time, when I reflect upon myself, I am pretty tactless or hopeless when I am dealing with relationships.

I am impatient, impulsive and emotional. It is good and bad depending on the situation but generally I guess it is not good. In fact sometimes I think about it, this is probably the reason why the previous relationship didn't work out. Maybe we weren't the best match in certain ways, which I have to admit, but there are times when I do loose my patience very easily, and it may not be obvious but I guess some damage are done in ways I never see..

Well, the reason I bring up this is pretty simple, I finally got my iPhone. To be honest, I feel guilty, for I have been really emotional on him (wrote something not nice) because I thought I got upset for not being able to get my brother something after expecting it for so long. It is not so much because of the phone itself, rather a promise that I thought doesn't carry any weight...

The reason I say "impulsive" is because somehow after the 3rd day, I really wasn't that upset anymore in fact I was checking with my own service provider on my own contract renewal within a year and so on to get it for my brother. I have pretty much just find alternative instead of really hating.. which is real..

In fact, I have never really quite think in his shoe and look at how busy and worn out he is until I saw him again and yet he still managed to sort it out for me, in a way that I somehow feel he probably would be reluctant or awkward because of some reason I knew of. It really makes me feel bad for throwing out my emotion so impulsively... My apologies if you are reading this..

Just thinking back, it reminds me that i ought to learn to be more patience, if I don't wan to loose the next person again.. I will try harder.. note to self!

Sunday, April 18, 2010

Gym Diary - A Checkpoint

Okay, this is superficial, this is shallow, this is.. I dun like the word cause it sounded really erm.. not nice.. but seems this is how the everyone calls it.. cam-whoring ... eeeww.. =p

But this is actually more of a gym record, it is like i was touching here and there trying to feel and then thought to myself yea there is something hard there, quite solid, chest looks not bad too after gym sessions, but still not exactly drooling material, so decided to take some photos and see how it is going to look in pictures... but err... u see it..

First a 乖乖仔-goodboy picture to start with, this was one during student time.. so pure and simple looking.. =p



Okay now the gym...



You probably notice a lot of unusual lightings effects there... which is okay, contrast and brightness effect, cause for one, I am too fair, doesn't look as good, and second, the lines are not well defined enough yet, so adding the contrast shadow effects makes them sort of more prominent..

No wonder they always say eye-shadow makes ur eyes look bigger, practically all shadows makes things looks bigger, example, cleavage shadow .. =p

Then another one, that i try to exert more force on the abs part.. Might look better with 50 push-ups..



Anyway... this is merely a shallow self-obsessed thingy, was thinking how come some people can look so good in photos.. i want too!! And also, somehow gym has been on 3 months, it is a good time to judge if 85 bucks a month is worht it or not too.. I am aware it is no where near solid and drooling material but at least at one glance, it is not too bad too right? =p

Let's see it again 3 months from now..

Saturday, April 17, 2010

My First Swarovski : For A Special Person

Today I bought my first ever Swarovski!!!

Okay, it is not exactly the most luxury jewelery around to boast about but still, it is relatively not cheap compare to my salary.. so still proud of it!!

Except it is not exactly for myself.. =p so i guess should have said my first purchase with Swarovski..

So this is it...!! Tadaa..


U probably wonder.. huh.. r u kidding.. wat kind of necklace is this, sciccors!??

well.. there is a reason of course.. first of all, this is a gift for my mom and she is a tailor. She has always been a housewife and doing part time tailoring for years because she has to look after us. She is skillfull no doubt but lack the opportunity. So when i went to university, and she has more time, she started working in a shop as an employee.. however, although she is skilled and the customer likes her.. her boss eventually fire her because there is another lady willing to be paid lower (my mom was getting a mere RM400 only back then..) her boss has always been exploiting them and then she even did this. I was furious then, cause obviously that salary was only for my mom to occupy her time with her interest and make friends with her cient, but she shudn't have to be treated like that! but the good side is, my mom has learned how a tailoring shop operates, the market price and so on.. so eventually i encourage her to start her own business.. a small stall. even better, the client from her previous stall actually came to her cause they like her and my mom was charging reasonably.. And i can say it went pretty well, i didn't ask how much she make monthly cause that's not the main concern aslong as she is not loosing money.. but just to give an idea on the business, last year my convocation was in late july, so she has to come here and close store, when i spoke to her around early june bout the dates.. she told me she has to reject some orders for my convo cause the booking is already so far down there.. i was speechless =s

So i thought scissors and threads necklace is such a unique design for her birthday and mothers day this year.. hope she likes it!

btw, in case u wonder if they make screwdriver and hammer design for engineers technicians.. nope cause this is not occupation collection, it is from the 'Alice In Wonderland' collection.. cool right!

Friday, April 16, 2010

Gay-friendly holiday: Thailand

My housemate sms me to ask if i am interested in a holiday for 3 days 2 nites at phuket around late June.. the offer is for around 250 sgd depending on hotel u choose.. (note that if u are going in pairs it is cheaper) and inclusive of flight and taxes.. from changi to phuket..

I was seriously tempted when i look at the price and the beaches.. the only thing i was hesitating is should i go with them? i mean i hav been to Bangkok with anothe group of uni friends and frankly i wont call it most enjoyable.. for one i kinda missed out on some gay destination..

This time round, it is beaches!! and Thailand is known for openness for gays.. so i was kinda imagining going with a date and holding hand strolling at the beaches.. and... kissing... =p isn't that romantic..!

that's what make me hesitate.. cause i wouldn't mind going with my housemate, they are my best mate in uni.. but on the other hand.. this is Thailand! and beaches and being naked, ah-hem, half naked i mean.. shudn't i go with a date instead.. it just feel so right!

gosh.. decision time again..

Thursday, April 15, 2010

Do you believe?

"Do you have a religious belief?"

I believe in things that I cannot explain, which include religions. But I am never a good follower, because I am the kind who likes to be free and not tied down by other people thoughts (in some way, but when it comes to relationship, it is my softpoint..).

I was in buddhist society committee member once and I have indeed learn a lot about the religion. I also have been to church (in Singapore) a couple of times and seen something that I never experience and never have thought (I don't mean seeing a miracle here).

I appreciate the thoughts of these great founders. They are definitely very smart people of their time to be able to apprehend so much. But there is always a part of religious that I strongly belief ties to the historic background, their time the culture back then. Thus I never quite belief is strict practicing and being over devoted. There is also a known fact of religious being used by politics throughout history, and furthermore, after so many centuries of passing down, there is naturally a doubt that something either in meaning of translation or passing from people to people that could have been distorted or "changed". I mean naturally these things do happen cause not 2 person are alike, so everyone study it with their own understanding...

So how i see religious is to take watever you feel is right, built our own believe on the "right" things. It gives us confidence that such belief are shared by the wise man who lived thousands years ago and many more. But never blindly believe..

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Many think he is hot (handsome? erm... subjective i guess), but... not my kind i guess, but i do like some of his songs.. like this one.

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Office Rumours

As expected, rumours will still be floating around while our soon-to-go boss is still around and how the next will be as well as our future..

Practically people are speculating, which i can still tolerate, but some which really get on my nerves are those that tell people stuff 'as-if' it is a fact from their tone, the level of confidence they say it (which obviously when u ask them who told u, their answer wud basically be 'i think la'- f*ck!). So yesterday was about our team going to merge with a bigger team(like in hundreds globally) which i dun really see it coming.. then there is also one about our boss being pay 40k a month.. yea right.. and our salary review by 3% (this is really... wtf!!! only 3 miserable percent!)

Then today there is a more reliable one from someone whom i rate 9/10 on the trust-able scale.. that our boss and the next sit-in boss and the big guy in our department imeeting to review our pay.. this time round they r talking bout 'market rate' which sounds much promising than the f*cking 3%.. (u may argue 3% of 1 million is a lot but fyi i am not earning that much..not anywhere near there even by lightyear speed..)

So now is the time to wait... for hopefully a pleasant surprise..^^

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

A powerful thing : N900

This phone has been the most powerful device i had to date.

Like how powerful it is? Basic phone function is there so nothing to be proud of, there is threaded sms but iphone was first so not the highlight either, gps, maps are there but still common, camera is good but i wonder why it is not as good as N82 which is like 10 times better.. i mean afterall they r from nokia.. hmm.. bloody nokia.. hey how come i am complaining =s

okay backtrack.. the really amazing thing bout this phone is the web browser, (unix operating system is a highlight too but not for the commons). For the past few nights, i hav been blogging from my baby.. and browsing blogs and all sites.. checking mail, ebuddy-ing.. it can even upload photos and videos to blogs and has a 'mouse-like' function... really cool for highlighting.. and just the other day i was opening fb while my friend did it the same time with his HTC (the one with the largest screen) and guess wat, my baby beats his by like 2 minutes (at least). same service provider.. to note.. and thats like bicycle and car speed in computer terms.. i was damn smug..=p

it is really a powerful internet device for ppl who use the net a lot.. with its mozilla browser..

another example below, i took the photo and now putting it on my blog...

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I went to toastbox again and this is the full set i usually have..



and guess wat being a regular, i realize they were being generous (either that or their finger slipped while pouring it out)..., like how we say the shop isn't own by their dad (express in canto =p)



look at the amount of meat floss they top on it.. i was kinda shocked too =s.. normally it wud be like half or one third..

wonder if they giv me 50% off next time..

Monday, April 12, 2010

Single Date

There are things which I always thought I would never do, but there is also a saying in canto that there is always a first time for everything. Which i know both are logically unrelated but I just need a start up that sounds cool..

Anyway, not talking bout ons here but just i actually went to the cinema alone today. Well for one i am not a movie fan, i only do it more for social purpose like outing or gathering with friends.
But somehow today i did it.. and the reason being,

- the house is damn hot in the afternoon, i cudn't sleep
- i cud get student price (yea call me cheapskate =p)
- the cinema is like 5 minute walk from home

And lastly, which is kinda sad *sob* is i really wanted to watch this one and i know there wont be anyone to accompany me for it.. most have watch it.. especially all the couple friends *sour*

oh yea, it's titans by the way, but have to say it wasn't as exciting as expected.. graphics, monster are good to be fair but those are expected.. but the gods with the shiny clothes are really crap.. hades looks cooler honestly with the dark smoke.. and all the nice guys have to die, so the only point i was touched and excited was the end when the lady was ressurected.. but other than that, the movie was really quite dissapointing. (and the jokes are not funny, i felt so awkward for actor to have to play that.. = =")

but yea.. it is the first time i watch a movie on my own.. gosh, i must try harder!! there must be someoe who wants to watch movie together right.. =p

Sunday, April 11, 2010

It's about wanting to see u smile, ain't it?

"It's about both making an effort.. "

I was typing till this point, the remaining part is " an effort to stay together to compromise", but then backspaced and retype

"It's about meeting the right person, who wants to see you happy and want to make an effort to be together, to compromise and to keep each other company.."

It started off as a conversation with a net friend i met recently, he is local and has a bf from thailand. Then our conversation enter into gay love and how appearance is the first factor most of the time, then comes to knowing the people and then personality coming in the picture..

Actually, for someone who never really "succeeded" in a relationship, i am not convinced how right or wrong my points are, pretty much just a feeling. BUt somehow at least it makes me realize, it is not as simple as making effort to compromise, it will have to have another prerequisite which is the other has the intention to want to be with u, or simply, he loves u... then it comes into bridging the difference and compromising on each other's wants and needs.. but the desire to keep each other happy is a first factor..

This song name, caught my attention. 認錯 (ren chuo) - admitting a mistake

Think about it, if the other person cares, how much of right/wrong is important, or is it more important to know the other is sad and actually neither wants to see each other is sad and try to make up for it for saying "sorry" ?

Probably I should have seen it, no matter how upset I was, it is never a "Sorry" but rather shutting of phone calls and no replies despite the anxiety and worries shown... shud have seen it coming..

-contest version, u may want to fast forward but it is very touching... a story of her own...

Saturday, April 10, 2010

Fatigue

I shud have gone home after work this morning but till this point, I am still hanging round at a mall..

Well, but it is a few coincidence.. one of which is the part our boss secretary ask us out to chat.. she was pretty upset our boss is leaving without her, and kinda talk about why it leads to that. at least a comforting thought is it wasn't the project going bad but rather a better offer arises. so it was a whole adternoon talking bout things we dunno and the future.. in a week time, we probably shud know more things, at least we all thought he wud say something else..

it was a tiring day but somehow i enjoy it... every little moment, wish this feeling can be real in time to come... =)

Friday, April 9, 2010

Guess who left?

One of my favourite person in the office... he is american style but he knows asian culture well.. he is efficient, no-nonsense, get-what-he-want kind of person, but yet, he is truly friendly and respect every single thing u want to tell him.. he hoist me up 3 times (i am 60+ kg) when someone talk bout lion dance, he treat everyone to harris after monthly meeting... but all of sudden, he announce he is leaving the company...

he is our beloved boss...

gosh, of all the people whom we guess will leave, it just never occur to us it will be him, at least not so soon... he is no doubt the best boss i ever had to-date.

all da best boss, in ur new venture..

Thursday, April 8, 2010

It must be feng shui

One thing i am pretty sure now is ground floor is never the best place to stay unless it is a house (i mean landed, but even that the only advantage it has over higher floor is u dun need to climb stairs.. that's bout it)

My new apartment (actually it's ours, share by 6 and rented) is at ground floor. for a start my room is hot, really bad timing for now when i need to sleep in the day and noon... *sniff sniff* next on is the kids and some youngster who play and talk loudly around the open area.. = =".. then there r people who pass by.. the piping is leaking.. yet.. but looks like.. clothes only can be hung indoor.. extra door lock... and the list go on..


gosh its less than a month i am in it... =s

but worse of all...... there is renovation facing my window!!!!!!!!!! all the drilling and smahing and hammering... which is why it must be fengshui! off all the time, has to be when i am doing night shift .. *sniff sniff*

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Being Predictable

Call it loyal, call it obssesive. Somehow i am the kind of person that once i like something, i will be going over it day-to-day..

Like last time i was on normal hour, i go for breadtalk 'rise and shine' every morning until the counter people know me so well, they know i dun take carrier so when a new comer try to pack it for me they will stop her..

And now, it is toastbox, every evening after gym i wud go for a toast set with eggs and yuan yang (coffee + tea)...



Well the thing is i order practically the same thing every day until the waitress know me so well she will get ready the soy sauce and pepper for me on my table, which i really appreciate.. but the worst (shud i say worst?) thing is the person who prepare the drink always make my yuan yang before i even order it at the counter =s as well as the people who does the toast.. i mean what if i suddenly feel like having something else, wont that be awkward? (okay but honestly nothing there is nice except yuan yang so that's fine) but the toast... hmm.. now i am like so predictable i dun even need to say anything and once i step near the counter my yuan yang is waiting for me there...

i dunno if this is good or bad but i am definitely a predictable person in that sense.. (this is also consider loyal right? stick to the one thing/person u like...)

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

The meanie side

There is a devil in everyone... someone must hav said this before.

I am nice by nature.. i dun harm small animals, i speak politely, i usually say yes.. and i tend to be patient with ppl (except on the waiting side). which is something like my weak point or triggering point.. of course i am still reasonable to some extent..

okay, so wat happen was there is this abs machine at the gym which everyone likes to use cause u dun have to do the sit up movement but rather bend down.. which i believe is the reason why it is highly popular.. what i hate is people hog the machine for 15 to 20 minutes each time and rest for so long on it... i mean come'on if u need to break just go somewhere and come back later.. so that's one thing i dislike when ppl hog it..

so today i was there again and 2 girls was taking turn, i waited until i finished 3 sets of 20 push up with weights and with break in between and they are still there.. there goes my patience.. so the first thought that came into my mind was going over and say,

"hiya girl, actually u shudn't hog that machine, cause what u really need is liposuction, this obviously wont help so dun waste everyone's time k?"

okay, just a thought and yea i feel i am really mean even to hav that thought... and obviously i shudn't discrminate ppl when i was once like that.. goah i hav to change.. =p but just i dun really like to wait.. another of my bad habits..

this is purely a confession and also a reflection? not really sure if i am gonna change though =p

Monday, April 5, 2010

Nocturnal Diary - Mc Cafe

To show how badly disoriented my biological clock and my mind are, this is an example..

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My roomate open the door, he was in formal dress, i look at clock and remember is vaguely 6, so my mind reached a conclusion that he is going to work, it is early 6am.. but the fact is that he came back.. when my mind flash back, yea the last time I saw him was indeed morning when I was watching youtube and watching him wake up, wash up and change and leave... =s my mind is like in a mess state..

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Anyway, that was just one of those moments nowadays.. I still remember a talk i attended by shisheido in year 1 when as new member of some clubs, we are forced to join a talk to make up the desired numbers. Anyway, the speaker say something about the "golden" hour for sleeping which is 10pm-2am. This is when ur body fully rest and regenerate. And it was kinda true, cause due to my current reverse hour, I felt like sleeping around 11pm, but i was reluctant.. so i drag until 12am.. until 1am and thought, okay it doesn't hurt to sleep a while and sleep more next day, but it's too late!!!!! I dun feel like sleeping anymore... now I am stuck.. *sniff sniff*

So, i was chatting, blogging, then watch the taiwan drama all the way till 3.30am when I felt hungry and thought of going to the prata shop (somewhat mamak in KL but its shop). They claim to be 24 hours but bloody hell, when i was there they close the 24hour light and was washing the floor... so much for my mutton soup.. Hmph...

Lucky, McD is 24/7 just beside them... phew.. but I was kinda fed up with their double chesse or chicken products... not to mention fries which i never buy cause they are really not nice... So the second lucky thing is, THIS IS ALSO A McCAFE!!!

I never appreciated it so much, but i had a cappucino (sugar less) and a blueberry muffin. Not the best muffin around but they heat it in an oven so it is still warm when i put into my mouth... Mmmmm.... nice...............

Never appreciate it so much and realize how cozy it is at that McDonalds at those hour. It is really cozy because of the sofa and cushion seatings, it is big, air-condition but juz nice ( i was wearing singlet and i dont feel cold) with a Mc Cafe with coffee and cakes (much cheaper than Starbucks), has music playing, the nite ones are usually classics and I can read my shopaholic book... gosh I LOVE this place now. Next time, if I am not clubbing or out anywhere, this is my place for the nite for sure..

Mc Cafe.. My ratings.. * * * * * - 5 stars

Sunday, April 4, 2010

幸福 (xin fu) - Happiness

*This is not a translation*

Have you ever thought, day-to-day we work, we love, we seek happiness, we get upset, we deal with our colleagues, we deal with our family... have you ever stop by one moment and think are we doing everything as life goes, or there is a goal that we seek..?

"... 为爱情付出 为活着而忙碌 为什么而辛苦 我仔细纪录... "

We are all learning as we move, when we were young, we have dreams, but the moment we step into the real world, we learn that it is not a perfect world, all relationships are complicated, there are some we can choose to avoid, those that are least important, but there are those that we have to learn to deal with, with the person we love, with our family. In this, we fall but we can never give up, we continure to learn... Because this is our lives..

"... 用我的双眼 在梦想里找路 该问路的时候 我不会装酷... "

Sometimes I do have doubt, should I move at a pace with the persoon I love? Should I slow him down? Should I accomodate everything he is, should I change for him? Cause I love him... How do I cope, when things changes, when he doesn't love me anymore? Do i wait or do i say go.. ?

"... 我还不清楚 怎样的速度 符合这世界 变化的脚步 生活像等待 创作的黏土... "

But I know, i am sure I know what's important to me, what I am reaching for in my life... I definitely know it better today than I did yesterday..

"... 幸福 我要的幸福 渐渐清楚... "

In fact, I know my life is not about being realistic, there are times I am allow to live my fantasy, to allow for mischieveness, to let myself wild, when i know i can bear that responsibility. It is all gonna make me more sure of what I dream of, what I aspire to be, when I have seen more and tried all...

"... 梦想 理想 幻想 狂想 妄想... "

Taking a step is never easy, but there is never going back in life right? A mistake cannot be reverse, but it will make us realize how to avoid it in the future. So be confident with every step we have decided, cause it is to the best of our own knowledge..

"... 我只想坚持每一步 该走的方向... "

No one is perfect, but failure brings us closer to being perfect. We choose what we want to be, and we should be proud of it... No matter what, live ur true self, if you do not want to regret it...

"... 就算一路上偶而会沮丧 生活是自己选择的衣裳... "

Happiness is when you dare to persue what you believe, happiness is when you always have faith in what you believe.

"... 幸福 我要的幸福 没有束缚 幸福 我要的幸福 在不远处... "

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Just some random thoughts about how I feel, when I persue my own love... But i was really touched by the lyrics...

I am sure I will be happy, as I truely believe... Trust our feelings, trust your own feeling...

Saturday, April 3, 2010

A night to remember

Things happen when you least expect it...

Yesterday night will be one of those night that I will remember forever. Many times, I would think of future, wonder if there will be a future and how things will go on. But yesterday night, somehow what happen makes me feel like whether there is a future or not, as I am sure, even thinking back, it will always put a smile on my face, because it is one of the sweetest moment I had in my life. This is already more than I dare to hope for. This one experience, the things that I only dare to dream, actually happen so naturally, without any hint or request. Most importantly, it is so natural and comfortable that nothing else seems to matter. This is like something you only imagine but it actually happen... What more can I ask for...

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May 8, May 10, May 11... what's common? This is like fate pulling a joke...

Friday, April 2, 2010

My 85 Dollar

Everytime I go to gym, my routine is pretty much the same, previously i attend classes on all day but recently due to the nite shift it was more like -> Jog -> Chest+Arm :machine -> Abs :machine -> Chest+Arm :machine -> Abs :machine -> ... -> Shower -> Toastbox -> Yuan Yang -> Office

Previously I do weight lifting but then one day this personal trainer came over when I was doing and started commenting on my scoliosis and say I shud be careful and can consider planning out the right sets so I woont hurt myself (yea right, mainly just want to get me sign up for those 80 bloody dollar PT session) but still, considering he might be right i decided to stop for a while, also not to give him chance to kacau...

Anyway the main thing is I never really look at myself in the gym mirror while topless (which many does when they are looking at their training results and I would help them to verify as well.. erh hem... hemm.. ) So i never actually noticed my body shape changed. It really looks different from 3 months ago, and the chest shape actually starts to look quite ok.. (well, still far from drooling level and furthermore I dun take protein supplement.. so... ) but still I get a shock when I see myself suddenly in the mirror that it is different..

Sseems like my 85 dollar is paying off ^^ . Maybe if 3 more months down it became "drool" level i will take photo and post here.. =p

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Someone say he looks like me again... gosh.. =p

Thursday, April 1, 2010

Interesting Place in Sg

Just woke up with blurry eyes and was browsing around then saw something that makes me "wake up".. Was like a WOOOOOWWWWWW discovery...

There is actually these kind of place in Singapore, some highlights

- Mens Club (strictly only for men, but anyway, makes sense oso, dun think girl will like it inside)
- Sauna, gym, pub all in one
- Different themes night ( eg, speedos, gymer nite, nothing at all nite- Naked!! )
- free for entry below 24 ( hmm wonder if i qualify, kinda at the border)
- open till 8 next morning (ideal for clubbing nites actually, furthermore is near)
- free supply of ...... and .... (okay, this is the more XXXX part)

I know saunas are common, but the way they market it seems very attractive. Really tempted to go down once =P . Of course it is not good to get addicted to these places, afterall the real intention of ppl going to these places is really obvious.. but looking at the way the market the place, wouldn't it make you feel tempted to go down once... to look and see around, i mean nothing-at-all-nite gosh, that's like what... !!!

And furthermore it is actually legal!!

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Can be a tourist hot spot too =p

http://www.absolute.sg/