Wednesday, June 9, 2010
Is this me?
This is definitely one of my favourite songs from Jolin. 妥协 (tuo xie) which means giving in to something or someone.
The story depicted by the lyrics is pretty straightforward, it is about a lover who keep changing oneself to please the other and also giving in to the other person's demand, never once daring to deny, because of the fear of losing him.
How often do we fall blindly in love? We thought we have found the best guy in the whole world, and keep giving in all our love and life and changing ourselves to please him. Until eventually when we look at ourselves and wonder, I dun look like myself... Sometimes when i think back of my previous relationship, until the time he was telling what he doesn't like about me... I realize the way he describe me, I feel like saying, no, you don't know me.. ask any of my friends.. but then i realize, it is true.. it is true when I am with him, I am not myself... because I tried too hard to impress, to go with his way...
But what do we get in the end? We get a person who thinks we are still not good enough, we can never keep him cause we were never worth anything to them. We try to keep the other person, to tie him to ourselves, but realize we are the one being tied, we have tied ourselves down to a person and not daring to venture out to seek who is really worth it.
Love is mutual, i guess when you don't feel it, maybe it is time to think if you are giving it to the right person.
Ccompromising is a sign of love, but giving in, seems to say more about selfishness...
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妥协 is needed to maintain a relationship, but if you 妥协 until you are no longer yourself, then it becomes pointless...might as well move on to someone who feel worthiness to be your lover. Love is mutual and 2-ways directions.
ReplyDeleteIf in order to make things work we have to make a little adjustment, I'm all for it. But if you feel that it strikes at the core of your being, then it's up to you decide whether or not to proceed. It is much easier to change ourselves than to expect others to change for us, and if you feel that its unilateral, then definitely review the relationship. :)
ReplyDeleteMr. Sky, yea.. except i kinda realize it after it ended... sometimes i do wonder if thats one of the reason that leads to the end.. that i am not myself at all...
ReplyDeleteWill, actually i am all for it too.. but somehow i realize i might have overdone it because i care too much to impress or to pleased.. until it feels like being taken for granted..